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Welcome to the Dolphin Healing Touch Journal.

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For a complete listing of journal entries, please see the Journal Archive in the right column.


Hang in There

It is amazing the difference in a day. The energies have been so tumultuous the last few weeks but the last few days in particular. The astrological presence of the grand cross, the energy of the 8/8 and the change of location for me have been very intense. It feels like everything in my world has been turned upside down. I have felt exhaustion and I have been on vacation not doing much but swimming and going for coffee at Starbucks to connect to the internet. I have been on an emotional roller coaster and attempting to hang on even though I just wanted to jump off and I didn’t care what happened.

On my journey I have been getting some very strong messages from my guidance, my higher self that I didn’t always want to hear. It meant letting go of comfort in old patterns of behavior.

I connected with an old friend from school about a month ago. He reached out to me and it was fun and exciting to have someone out of your past actually make first connection. We are not sure what the nudge was all about but karmically we have seen some very interesting patterns and lifetimes emerge.

Part of my decision to come to California on my mainland trip was to connect with him although I love the desert and I had wanted to return for the past year. So I felt our connection gave me that extra reason and permission.

I arrived almost 2 weeks ago and his car broke down, so he has been unable to drive the 2-3 hours to come and see me. At first I just felt that it was meant to be and on his day off the following week his car would be repaired. Well it wasn’t and although my spirit knew that all was in divine timing, the part of me that is human felt abandoned, frustrated, like he really didn’t want to see me, and all my human fears came out about not getting what I wanted.

I had gone through many scenarios with him in my mind and the truth was I have no idea why we were connected. Yesterday I was flinging old energies around about another piece of abandonment with another ‘friend?’ who had said we would get together before I left and wouldn’t return my phone call. I had been warned about him and yet I didn’t want to loose his friendship. I guess that was another one of my lessons. Listen to your intuition, it is an important guide.

I felt I had been put through the wringer and called another friend who had wanted to get together before I left and we went out to dinner. When one door closes another opens. During dinner a text came from my friend and he said he had gotten an alternative vehicle and he could come down Wednesday. Could I change my departure date?

Well... a few days ago I had gotten the message that I probably would be changing my return flight to Portland. That was about the time the energy got intense. But nothing happened so I just decided that nothing was going to happen. Never underestimate the energies of the universe that you have put into motion.

When I received the text my first reaction was to be skeptical. (you see how we create then question our creation) We weren’t able to talk right away because I was in the middle of dinner with my friends but I was leaving the next morning at 8am for the airport. Sooo, I texted him as soon as I was able that we needed to talk and the creative energy was rolling. When I asked my guidance whether I was to change my ticket, I got a strong yes.

Right now I have a cancelled ticket, no return date, I have to wait till Monday to get a cheaper ticket and I will check in with my guidance this morning to determine when I fly out, but I am still not getting a why.

I think we are not always to know. I do know that both of us needed to go through some deep thought about what we want out of life and how much we are willing to change ourselves to make that happen. When I asked, my guidance said that his car broke down because they were protecting me (from myself and my own patterns or was it protecting me from something within him?). I am not sure and yes to all of that.

Talk about pressure pushing things out of your being, I have felt that pressure squeezing me until I cried uncle. I asked for changes and almost didn’t make it. I wonder if I could hold up under torture. I think one of the biggest tortures we have is sometimes letting go of old patterns. We guard our treasures and even though they are uncomfortable in our pockets, we hold on to those hard-earned pieces of dysfunction. Remember the monkey who finds food in the bottom of the jar, and when he grabs it, he can’t get his hand out of the neck? He would rather starve then let it go.

I know this is growth and today I finally feel at peace. I woke up at 4:44am and felt a strength I have not felt for a long time. Like I have created something good, and there is a feeling of clarity around me that I have yearned for. My guide that came was Yeshua. He is standing beside me on this journey. He is my friend.

The day is bright, a hummingbird danced on the air in front of me. The air is cool on the desert. I love my life and am glad I was able to hang in there. I don’t know what tomorrow will bring, I am done making up stories. I thank my higher self for the guidance and the changes within me.

I know when I return to Hawaii in a couple of weeks that I will not be the same person who left on this grand adventure. I know I will look back on this summer in fondness and the memory that I was able to hang in there.

After I finished writing this blog, I opened an email from Tom Kenyon and the Hathors. I have included a link because it talks about jumping time lines and choosing the way we live. I think it is timely and a lot of what has been happening to me. Enjoy


Stepping Off The Precipice Leap of Faith

I couldn’t decide what to call this posting. When we are ready to take that giant step into a new venture, it is pretty scary. Do you remember the Indiana Jones movie where he has to walk from one side of a chasm to the other, clearly seeing the path up to the edge then nothing? That is what that leap of faith looks like.

At times we have prayed for something to change in our life and when it comes, we are too afraid to accept what places outside of our comfort zone.

When we are children we have dreams of flying or leaping over large distances. We felt a freedom that is hard to experience in our everyday life. That is why many people take up flying or skydiving. It gives you the experience of the flight in a way we only dreamed of.

But there is a lot to say about the safety of the earth. We become afraid of the fall so we become more cautious. We take each step more carefully instead of the surefootedness we have as a child.

What makes us afraid of something new? What would happen if we fell flat on our face? Is it because of the fact that we get farther from the ground? And is that a metaphor that we no longer trust the earth around us?

Lots of questions, but few answers. When I moved from Portland, Oregon to Kona, Hawaii, it scared some people. I had to step out on that precipice and take off without ground beneath me. Hawaii is a big move because you can only ship so many things and you have to let go of a lot. I shipped two small crates of only my prize possessions and have since let go of most of those. People who were afraid of their own power saw me take the leap and it made them think.

We posses, we gather things around us for security. That includes our thought forms and habits. When we ask for change that universe offers us many possibilities and then challenges and asks “are you sure?”. We hold on to familiarity even though it is uncomfortable and usually dysfunctional. We stay in relationships and begin to resent the fact that they are holding us back. We may still be in love but it may be holding us back from our true path. There is something lacking in our lives and we feel that emptiness. Those relationships may be our job, our friends, living space or even habits including things like being critical of others because of the shadow within us.

What step are you asking for or is the universe asking of you? Are you willing to remember how to fly? Are you willing to step off the precipice and look at the world as a lot of possibilities instead of the narrow window we have been looking out of?

Relationships don’t need to be thrown away, but the way we look at them may need to change. If it feels like you are chained to someone or something and not move out, why do you keep those self imposed chains that keep you bound?

Open your horizons. Look up to the sky. Stand at the edge and step off. Who knows where it will lead but if you don’t take the step, you won’t ever know.

One of my favorite quotes is by Marianne Williamson:

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”


Being In A State of Awareness

Before I left on my journey, I had a friend tell me that I would meet someone in my travels to Palm Desert. She told me to be observant of those that came into my life. Yesterday was one of those days of being aware.

I had just arrived in Palm Springs to see a friend who I haven't seen for a year. We got to the pool and before I could slip into the pool we heard a gentleman ask if I could drive him to his bank. What an odd request from a complete stranger and especially when my girlfriend had just connected about 10 minutes before. He stated that his electricity had been turned off because of repairs and his car had been locked into his garage. He had looked around for a friend to take him and could find no one.

I was very torn because #1 I did not know who he was and #2 my friend would be left alone if I took him. And with her children there she could not drive this man, it was up to me. I asked my higher self what to do. I was told strongly to go. Perhaps this was who I was supposed to meet.

As we headed out to the car he invited myself, my girlfriend and her mother to an evening at his home, only it would be in two days time. My girlfriend was going to be heading back to work and to her home north of LA and her mom would be watching the kids. Palm Springs is over a half hour drive from our home in Palm Desert. It seemed an odd invitation but I realized that I could make it, I only needed to step out of my comfort zone.

On the way to the bank we talked about where I was from and he had a home on the same island where I live. He told me a bit about his travel plans for the year and the homes he had around the states.

He also told me that he appreciated the gift of service that I had given him. He said he always tried to help others in need and that it came second nature. I was glad that my discomfort did not stop me from helping him.

Perhaps he was a gift from the spirit world. In Hawaii there is a legend that if you see and old woman walking along the side of the road and she stops you and asks for a ride, that it is important to offer. Pele (the goddess of the volcano and a strong spirit of Hawaii) tests you. Offering her the ride is a selfless service and after you let her out at her destination she often disappears as you look back in your mirror.

What gifts does the land bring? What are you willing to receive? Being in a state of awareness of the people and gifts around you blesses each and every step of your journey here on earth. Be kind to all you meet, walk gently on this earth, stay in a place of the heart, and be open to what crosses our path. Who knows what this event on Friday will bring but I am open to the possibilities.

Carpe Diem! Seize the day!

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